Brian Bitner @toadflax

http://youtube.com/brianbitner

Movie columnist at JoBlo.com, host of @NINPodcast, maker of music, traveler, actor, writer, guy.

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Birthday girl.
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Birthday girl.

Well, I certainly didn't think I was coming to Orange County today.
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Well, I certainly didn't think I was coming to Orange County today.

This morning I discovered something I have in common with George Clooney.

Yesterday morning, I went to my car to find someone had been inside during the night looking for goodies. At 4:11 this morning, I woke to a car alarm going off in my neighborhood, so I donned some black clothes (I have a few) and went to investigate.

After about 30 minutes of walking slowly down my block looking for movement, a pickup truck pulls onto my street, goes one way, turns around, goes past me (hidden behind a tree), and stops. A guy gets out, walks up a driveway, walks back, gets in, and the truck turns around to leave again. I duck behind a car and try to get a photo of the license plate, but to no avail.

I walk the direction it came from, and a few minutes later, as I'm in the middle of a well-lit intersection, I see it come toward me and turn down a street a block away. Did they see me? I race down a parallel street to see which way they're going, but by the time I get to the end, the truck is nowhere in sight. I walk to the intersection where it would've ended up if it continued down the street I saw it on, and it's quiet, but there is a pickup truck parked catty corner from my position. I consider it momentarily, but there are several pickups in my neighborhood, so I decide to walk up the street back to where I saw them turn in case they were still on that street or had turned around again.

I get about halfway down the street when I hear a car start behind me. It's the parked truck! I duck behind a car to watch, the truck turns around to face me, starts to come my way- and takes a left at the intersection. I run down to the end of the street just in time to see it pull out of my neighborhood, escaping my grasp into the coming dawn.

So anyway, me and Clooney? We both make a shitty Batman.

#georgeclooney #batman #neighborhoodwatch #storytime #vannuys
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This morning I discovered something I have in common with George Clooney. Yesterday morning, I went to my car to find someone had been inside during the night looking for goodies. At 4:11 this morning, I woke to a car alarm going off in my neighborhood, so I donned some black clothes (I have a few) and went to investigate. After about 30 minutes of walking slowly down my block looking for movement, a pickup truck pulls onto my street, goes one way, turns around, goes past me (hidden behind a tree), and stops. A guy gets out, walks up a driveway, walks back, gets in, and the truck turns around to leave again. I duck behind a car and try to get a photo of the license plate, but to no avail. I walk the direction it came from, and a few minutes later, as I'm in the middle of a well-lit intersection, I see it come toward me and turn down a street a block away. Did they see me? I race down a parallel street to see which way they're going, but by the time I get to the end, the truck is nowhere in sight. I walk to the intersection where it would've ended up if it continued down the street I saw it on, and it's quiet, but there is a pickup truck parked catty corner from my position. I consider it momentarily, but there are several pickups in my neighborhood, so I decide to walk up the street back to where I saw them turn in case they were still on that street or had turned around again. I get about halfway down the street when I hear a car start behind me. It's the parked truck! I duck behind a car to watch, the truck turns around to face me, starts to come my way- and takes a left at the intersection. I run down to the end of the street just in time to see it pull out of my neighborhood, escaping my grasp into the coming dawn. So anyway, me and Clooney? We both make a shitty Batman. #georgeclooney #batman #neighborhoodwatch #storytime #vannuys

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"How To Sunday" by Ziggy Stardust Bitner
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"How To Sunday" by Ziggy Stardust Bitner

Thanks for an excellent time, Seattle. ♥️
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Thanks for an excellent time, Seattle. ♥️

Somewhere.
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Somewhere.

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#underground
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#underground

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Stopped off for a Talisker because not everything I do in Seattle has to be about Seattle okay jeez.
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Stopped off for a Talisker because not everything I do in Seattle has to be about Seattle okay jeez.

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